Sunday, February 10, 2013


It's been a while....

It's also been very rough. My son refusing to speak to me has me in a deep depression. He's 600 miles away. A week ago, I was up by myself online and happened to look over and see my metformin(diabetes med) bottle. I impulsively took the bottle of pills. An hour later, I panicked. I woke Kelly and we called an ambulance. I stayed in ICU for 2 days, then the mental ward for 4 days. I thought I would NEVER do anything like that again. I don't think I wanted to die, otherwise I wouldn't have told Kelly. In my other attempt, I've never told anyone and they haven't been with pills. I usually lose alot of blood when I try if you understand. But someone always fins me unconcious in a mess of blood.

I feel so damn guilty. My mother, who usually gets very angry was so very supportive this time. She even sent me a recovery card. Also, my sister who just went through a miscarriage and has been in so much emotional pain has been supportive. It makes me feel better that they aren't angry with me. It gives me strength.

If you read this, know that suicide is never the answer. You can live through anything if you try hard enough. Never give up!

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